Up Hill Battle

I have not fallen off the face of the planet. I have been running. I kind of had to start from square one because of all the back issues. I am stretching more. I think it has a lot to do with my hamstrings. They are just so tight and then it ends up kinking my back. I’ve noticed a lot less back issues when I stretch my legs out more.

Speaking of going back to square one on my running, I was actually quite discouraged a few months ago because I thought I was so out of shape. I mean I couldn’t even run two miles without breathing heavy. I thought the treadmill was up at an incline but the stupid thing said zero every time I checked it. One day I got on it and decided to run at a decline because our treadmill will do a negative three. When I put it back to zero it felt sooooo much better and I knew it had in fact been left at an incline even though the machine said zero. Then I had this weird sense of deja vu. Then I felt stupid. Then I felt relief. Then I felt better about my running. It was this weird roller coaster of emotions over my silly treadmill. I may have even written about something similar, but I haven’t had any time to go back over what I wrote. The holidays with two toddlers has been crazy (more about that later).

Then I thought, Geez! Talk about walking an uphill battle! I was thinking of all this about the same time I thought about how much I miss hanging out with my old friends.Then I thought about how we really haven’t made many new friends since we moved to the Mid-West. I don’t want to say we haven’t made any friends at all. We have made some friends, but I just feel like we aren’t as close as we have been to others in places we lived in the past. My husband says it is because we have kids now. That is probably true. I’ve been stressing so much about making close friends here that I’ve neglected the ones I already have. Just because they don’t live close to me doesn’t mean they don’t care. I need to reconnect with them. I need to spend less time worrying about something that may or may not happen with someone else and pay attention to people who have “been there and done that” with me already.

Like I said it isn’t we haven’t made any friends. We may become very close to some of them some day and that may have to be when the kids are older or in some other kind of way. We just aren’t able to go and “hang out” like we used to. If we go and do something like eating out, we usually have to bring the kids, cater to the kids, and talk about the kids. Don’t get me wrong. We love our kids, we love being with them, and we LOVE talking about them. We just need to find a way to get more grown up time in is all. I just get myself all worked up about how I think something should go instead of stepping back and looking at the situation for what it is.


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